Dear Ray J…

Kim Kardashian was married over the weekend and, while most young couples get themselves in debt with $34 mixed medium wedding invitations and personalized scented soy candle party favors, Kim will be earning a cool $15 million on her big day.  Happy Monday!

The problem is, no matter how much money she makes or how successful she becomes, her wikipedia entry will forever start with “made famous by getting pissed on by Brandy’s brother in a skeevy sex tape” (I’m paraphrasing here… but honestly not by much); a fact that her future children… her children’s children, will all be painfully aware of: “yeah, grandmama got peed on like a dirty little whore by some rapper”  (is Ray J a rapper and, more importantly, am I racist for assuming that he is?).  So, friends, it’s a matter of character, dignity, self-worth… a time to look deep into your soul, check in with your moral compass and ask yourself: “would I get pissed on for millions and millions of dollars?”.  And the answer (of course) is a resounding HELL YEAH!!!  Bring it!!!

Congrats Mr. and Mrs. Humphries!!

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