Dear Scarlett Johansson…

A couple days ago some naked pics of Scarlett Johansson were leaked on the internet. Zzzzzzzzzzzz.  Oh sorry.  That was me sleeping because I’m SO BORED OF THE LAME ASS LEAKED NAKED PIC SCANDAL.  And let’s get real, we’re just talking about a few shots of Scarlett’s jugs… do we really need to involve the federal government?  (She’s got the FBI on the case and you know they’re super bummed about this assignment.  “What’s that, boss?  You need me to investigate the most beautiful girl in the world’s breasts?  Whatever you need!”)

There are so many photos that I find waaaaay more scandalous than boob shots — FOOT shots, for example.  I once saw a close up picture of Paris Hilton’s monstrous feet and it’s haunted me ever since.  And Victoria Beckham’s feet have more bunions than toes.  These are the kind of pics celebs should really be ashamed of.

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One Response to “Dear Scarlett Johansson…”

  1. ps. Scarlett, you’re a millionaire. Buy a better camera.