Posts Tagged ‘Detroit’

Dear Clint Eastwood…

Sunday, February 5th, 2012

So I’m watching the Superbowl… just lovin’ life, throwing back some beers, eating 1000′s of calories worth of guacamole and enjoying some high production value commercials with my pals. It was just another fun day of using football as an excuse to eat and drink excessively with friends. Life doesn’t get better than this, right?… until… sandwiched between “wacky” curly haired commercial actors doing spit-takes for no reason and Ferris Bueller bringing me back to my youth, Clint Eastwood appears and brings everyone down. Oh yeah, we’re all broke. Oh yeah, the whole country is pretty much broke. Oh shit, Clint, you’re right, life is just crap. Well thanks. Thanks a lot. Someone get Danica Patrick or that kid from last year with the Darth Vader mask on the horn, America needs them!

Dear Eminem…

Thursday, February 24th, 2011

Eminem has just passed Lady Gaga as the world’s most popular living person on Facebook.  I’ll be honest, I think it has less to do with his latest CD and more to do with that Chrysler ad.  Have you guys seen it?  Making Detroit look look anything less than straight up terrifying — that takes some skill.  He already won a Grammy this year, is there time for the Oscars to add a new category: “Best Lead in a Commercial”?  I mean let’s face it, Detroit is a total shit hole.  It’s like a bigger, dirtier Buffalo — but at least Buffalo has good wings.  Detriot’s got nothing other than, uh, hmmmm, well… I really wanted to put something good right here and after 3 minutes of staring at my computer screen I can’t seem to think of a single thing.  Yet somehow you throw Eminem behind the wheel of a Chrysler and score it with some pulsating “8 Mile” tunes and I’m over here rooting for Detroit like it’s an ugly 3-year old on Toddlers & Tiaras or the homeless son of an addict on Idol.  Let’s go Detroit!!

PS. Just discovered one good thing about Detroit: they’re erecting a life size statue of Robocop downtown. Ok ok Detroit, sheesh! You win!