Posts Tagged ‘italy’

Dear Kat Von D…

Tuesday, October 4th, 2011

Kat Von D was on twitter today calling her ex Jesse James a cheater.  And the entire world replied with a collective “duh”.

Listen, when you date a guy who cheats on Sandra Bullock, you’ve got to realize what you’re getting yourself into.  It’s like dating Snooki and expecting her to start wearing underwear and not show her vagina to hundreds of club-going Italians (ahem, Jionni, are you listening?).  When the WHOLE COUNTRY is calling someone a cheater, you kinda gotta listen.  Just like in college when the whole football team called my boyfriend “Gay Timmy”, maybe I shoulda taken note.

Dear Stacy Keibler…

Sunday, August 7th, 2011

Stacy Keibler is dating George Clooney.  Yeah.  THAT Stacy Kiebler.  The one who was a PRO WRESTLER.  So either she has a great personality or she’s really good in the kitchen (and by kitchen I mean bedroom).  The problem is, normal girls like me can’t compete with her bedroom prowess… she’s a trained professional when it comes to wacky out-of-the-box antics.  I bet she’s smashing break-away chairs over his head and doing back handsprings in her sexy nightie.  Now that’s foreplay!

PS… no posts this week… SOMEONE’S ONE VACAY!!!!!