Posts Tagged ‘Obama’

Dear Kate Middleton…

Friday, July 8th, 2011

THE BRITISH ARE COMING!!  THE BRITISH ARE COMING!!  If you haven’t heard the news: Will and Kate are coming to L.A. today!!! Will it be like when Obama came and all traffic was at a standstill for 3 days?!  Which happened to fall on an afternoon when I had to drive the 9 and a half miles from Santa Monica to West Hollywood and it took four hours?!  And take 2 pee breaks?!  And a stop for provisions?!

Oh we can only hope!

Listen, I’ve already made it known on here that I think most of what goes on in England is a crock of shit (meat pie? really? how do you F up PIE?!?!), but I’ll give ‘em this: that was a damn good wedding.  Here’s wishing Will and Kate a fun trip to my fair city!  And here’s hoping they leave before becoming a douchebag and insecure with body issues, respectively.

Dear Dr. Drew…

Wednesday, March 9th, 2011

Michaele Salahi (half of the wily duo made famous by penetrating multiple layers of White House security to sneak into Obama’s first state dinner while being filmed for a Bravo reality show) was just booted from Dr. Drew’s Celebrity Rehab because, get this, she’s not addicted to anything.  I’ve been noodling over this one and I think the good doctor’s logic is all wrong.  The fact that she’s not addicted to anything, yet at the same time was on a reality show whose sole purpose is to cure people who have addictions, proves that she’s addicted to fame.  Or infamy.  Or being on the cover of Us Weekly.  There’s an addiction for you: addicted to seeing oneself while lining up with your “10 items or less”.  The problem is, if I’ve diagnosed this correctly, ejecting her from the show was the worst thing Dr. Drew could’ve done because I’m sure she’ll be on In Touch within days with the headline “Even Dr. Drew Couldn’t Help Me” or some shit like that.  Hopefully Christina Aguilera will keep spiralling out of control and stay on top of the celeb rags.  Oh look, she is.