Posts Tagged ‘swearing’

Dear Anderson Cooper…

Friday, August 19th, 2011

I’m sure you guys have all heard about how (a much fatter and older than I remembered) Gerard Depardieu pissed on a plane on Tuesday night — not in the bathroom, mind you — in the aisle. Let’s just agree right up front that that story is fantastic.  How does something like that get better?…  ADD ANDERSON COOPER!

Here’s a list of things I love:
- foreigners doing weird shit
- poop jokes
- Youtube clips live newscasts where someone on the air swears/barfs/falls/laughs uncontrollably

Can you say HAT TRICK?!  Watch and enjoy… (the giggling really takes off around the 2:30 mark).  And when you’re done with Mr. Gigglepants, do yourself a favor and watch the links above.  You’re welcome!!

Dear Reese Witherspoon…

Tuesday, June 7th, 2011

Sunday night at the MTV Movie Awards Reese Witherspoon gave a touching, heartfelt speech about how you don’t have to be a “bad girl” to make it in Hollywood.  She said:

“So, for all the girls out there, it’s totally possible to be a good girl; I’m going to try to make it cool.”

And somehow, in this poignant moment of female empowerment, with this class act A-list role model giving words of wisdom with grace and humor and sophistication to millions of rapt teenage girls watching her live across the globe… somehow she managed to work in the word “motherfucker”.  We can file this under “irony”.*

Here’s the thing, no one wants to hear Reese Witherspoon say “motherfucker”, it’s just not right.  It’s like when my mom tries to say the word “cool” and it somehow comes out as two syllables.  The guy whose job it is to bleep that kind of shit probably took a pee break as soon as he saw her coming onstage… “ahhhh, I’m good for a couple minutes, Reese would never do anything crazy”.  Well Reese, I have a feeling that bleeper guy is spending his Monday filing for unemployment.  Who’s the motherfucker now?!

On a related note, Robert Pattinson also dropped an F-bomb but I barely noticed because he has that wacky British accent that just makes everything sound like he’s talking about a polo match.

* I actually am filing this post under “Irony”. Additional tags include “Actress” and “Annoyingly Skinny” (because I’ve got a systematic method of keeping track of my posts and will not let this throw me off), but I made a whole new tag to really bring this one home!  File this under “pleased with myself”.  (I’m not really filing it under that, you can only go so far with this B.S.)